its been almost a week since i last posted. you may be wondering about the title. i would be intruiged if i read that title in someone's blog. of course, being a teenager and having the life that i lead, i don't think i'm qualified to have a depression. hence, the quotation marks. but to me, i think i just went into a mild depression. according to www.kidshealth.org the signs of depression are:

• depressed mood or sadness most of the time (for what may seem like no reason)
• lack of energy and feeling tired all the time
• inability to enjoy things that used to bring pleasure
• withdrawal from friends and family
• irritability, anger, or anxiety
• inability to concentrate
• significant weight loss or gain
• significant change in sleep patterns (inability to fall asleep, stay asleep, or get up in the morning)
• feelings of guilt or worthlessness
• aches and pains (even though nothing is physically wrong)
• pessimism and indifference (not caring about anything in the present or future)
• thoughts of death or suicide

the ones underlined are of course the ones that apply to me. you may ask what the cause of this depression is. well, its because i'm not an OS. i think my world just went in slow motion when it sunk in. we were in EK having a great time and then mrs dela pena texts ysabel to tell her the details of practices. ysabel texted bak to ask who the other OSs are. miss replied: lourdes, mikka. EHMAGAWD! that only means one thing. i'm not an OS. i just went into a depression from then on. i couldn't feel anymore. except sadness. to make things worse, my mom decides to show up. good thing i have awesome friends because she didn't suspect a thing. she only commented that we look 'really tired' anyway, after 2 days of wallowing in my sadness, on saturday, my dad, ate ida and I went to gateway to watch the movie 300. we went to see the last full show so it was about midnight when we finally came home. my sister goes up and i follow her, tired. she then says 'uy, OS ka daw'. WHATT? a sudden euphoria comes over me. then I see taped to the hall mirror, a message from my mom saying i was an OS. my mom was already in dreamland but i had to get all the details. turns out ysabel called to tell me i'm an OS. she asked mrs dp all the OSs and i was part of the list. AHHHH! i just couldn't sleep that night. i called belay the very next morning to confirm. on monday, i got an official text from mrs dp! yay! i'm not so worthless afterall. so that's how i got over my depression. nothing beats depression better that good news =)

p.s. to reward me, dad got me this amazing bag from oxygen. =)